


take me away before heaven could.

by cafemints



Series: from: eri [4]
Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, But it's sad, Established Relationship, Fluff, Heavy Angst, Hohong are inlove, Hohong-centric, M/M, Romantic Fluff, Short One Shot, im crying as we speak
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-31
Updated: 2020-03-31
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:29:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23409076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cafemints/pseuds/cafemints
Summary: His ink bleeds and pours why he loved him everyday (and the words he still wants to say). Until one day, he was all out of ink, leaving the rest of the pages of his diary untouched, unwritten.324th. I had a cold nightmare. It was bittersweet. Thanks to you.
Relationships: Jeong Yunho/Kim Hongjoong
Series: from: eri [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1646638
Comments: 7
Kudos: 43





	take me away before heaven could.

**Author's Note:**

> [♡]. . . for my lovely friend [gillian](https://twitter.com/moontaekoos) who had me sobbing when she sent me this prompt a long time ago. i love you and i hope you love this one :')
> 
> before reading, please do take note of the archive warning! this is ALL fictitious. some hearts have to be shattered sometimes, too. :')
> 
> (why is it always sad when i write hohong aha...)

_Day 12. His hair is deadass fried, too. But, he looks super cute :(_

Oh. It was that day.

They were in the school field, eight people sitting together in the bleachers. Their Thursdays always went like this - sitting in different classes, staring at the time, waiting for it to strike 3 o’clock, and then, they would be free to go wherever they want. That wherever would always end up to be this field. If only they had extra money, they would go to a nearby convenience store for an ice cream and - if even luckier - bags and bags of chips. But, they were only 16 with not even a quarter left in the pocket of their jeans. So, the school field was always the first on their list.

The eight friends would sit there together. For sometime, Jongho, Yeosang, and Mingi would be down the field, playing with whatever they could find and modify as their ball. Wooyoung and San would sometimes join, too, if they found the game fun enough. Seonghwa would always be the last. He would only join if he “can’t stand these lovey-dovey asses anymore” and that would be him referring to, of course, Hongjoong and Yunho themselves.

They were always together on Thursday afternoons. While the rest would play down the field, the two of them would sit together. Sometimes, they would talk, look up at the sky, and wonder how things work - how stars align and how they affect each individual, how Hongjoong was a Scorpio, how Yunho was an Aries, and if those signs were okay together. And they would end up with, “We’re okay together” and Hongjoong would find the tips of Yunho’s ears go as red as Hongjoong’s hair.

Right. His hair. It was _fried._

Yunho laughed until his stomach ached when he once had touched Hongjoong’s hair. It was also on a Thursday afternoon, right in the same place, right below the same stars concealed behind the blue skies. Seonghwa went down the bleachers right away as soon as Hongjoong laid his head down on Yunho’s lap, surprising the latter. He kept the small book he always had in his hand to his side for a while just so he can play with Hongjoong’s newly dyed hair.

Hongjoong was actually so excited about it that he still had a huge smile despite being in the detention room earlier. He was so excited that he had laid his head down on Yunho’s lap to show it off and, “Stop staring at your diary whatsoever and look at my hair instead,” he said, eyes closed and relaxed, and a very proud smile on his sunkissed face.

What he didn’t know, though, was that Yunho had been looking at it the very second he saw it. And he had been admiring it since then that he had to write it.

“Yeah, okay, sure. Your hair is really cool.” Yunho rolled his eyes, then giggled afterwards. “And this isn’t a diary.”

Hongjoong snickered as he lifted his own book, - the pink one with little strawberries as its pattern - showing it off to Yunho. “I would say this isn’t a diary, too. But, it’s most likely one.”

Yunho hummed curiously. He had been friends with Hongjoong for years and had been his boyfriend for over a week, but it was the first time he had seen the pink little book. “What’s in there?” he asked as he tried to stretch out his hand to grab it, but Hongjoong was faster enough to get it as far from him as possible.

“Nope,” Hongjoong disapproved, popping the letter ‘p,’ “But, I can show you a little page. For inspo,” he said before he flipped through the pages (and Yunho did his best attempts to take a peek through at least one, but Hongjoong was always so fast).

Finally, the thumbing and flipping of pages came to a stop. Hongjoong fully opened the book wide enough for Yunho to see and for him to realize the jaw-dropping artwork his boyfriend had done.

And he had done it for him.

It was Yunho, in a yellow hoodie and with what seemed to be turquoise blue hair. Each line was perfected by repeated scribbles of a pen, again and again, until it looked pop. It looked like one of those drawings Hongjoong had done on one of the leaves of his notebook when bored in class. He would think of something and then, would unconsciously draw it out. 

(So, Yunho blushed as he silently thought that maybe Hongjoong was thinking of him when he did this.)

The only difference between this and among all the other lazy sketches he did during mundane classes was that this had colors. Hongjoong had taken his time using watercolors, which Yunho remembered he hated so much to use. But, thank god, he began to love it at least for this one piece because the hues of yellow and blue brought it even more alive.

Also, Yunho had never thought he would actually look good with hair in blue.

“Why did you give me blue hair?” Yunho asked on that Thursday afternoon.

“I don’t know. I thought it would suit you,” Hongjoong shortly replied, eyes nowhere but on the skies.

“I think it does,” Yunho said.

And it did, actually. The turquoise blue hair really did look good on Yunho even outside the world of art and in reality. He found out about it the following Saturday. He was young and foolish and had not thought of the following events that could later unfold right after he asked Hongjoong to come over to his house and dye his hair blue. 

One of these said events were good, though. It was fun being in the bathroom, talking with Hongjoong, who sat on the sink (because he was way smaller compared to Yunho; he had to be able to reach for his hair), while his hair was being dyed. And he felt better when he looked at himself through the mirror and concluded that life could really imitate art.

What followed after was detention on Monday, of course. Yunho should have known. He was simply thankful that Hongjoong was there, too, for his third and final detention. So, he felt less alone.

“Having any regrets now?” Hongjoong asked, tilting his head to the side as he looked to his now ocean-haired boyfriend.

The teacher-in-charge had shushed them, but Yunho still chuckled audibly and shook his head no. “I think I like it. It matches with your red, too.”

Hongjoong bobbed his head with pride. “You look super cute, too,” he said as he winked. Yunho yelped a little in shock. Then, he punched Hongjoong on his arm, causing the other to groan even louder, which had maddened the teacher even more.

_Day 32. This must be the 17th time I will be talking about this. But, dear god, his smile is so so bright it could light up the whole room. So cliche, but it really could._

Yunho was in his dull biology class on the 32nd day.

He thought they were discussing something like phototropism — how a part of a plant moves towards the source of light or something like that. Yunho was not very sure. It was the last thing he heard before he began staring at the outside world through the open windows. He had his chin on the tabletop, right within his arms, and he was just staring, consciously waiting for the time to pass by.

Mingi, who was seated across from him, was waving his hand in front of his eyes to wake him up apparently. But, Yunho simply ignored him. He was too bored to do more than just staring.

So, he sat like that. Chin on the table top. The teacher’s words going through one ear then leaving through another. Mind on the ticking time. Eyes focused on the outside through the open windows. He was lost in his own little world until he heard his own name being called.

“Yunho-ya!”

Yunho was sure that would not come from his tedious biology teacher. She would not have a voice as beautiful as that. So, he was very certain that it came from the vibrant red-headed boy from the outside, with the most beautiful and biggest smile on his face as he looked to him through the windows.

“Listen to your teacher, you idiot!”

And Yunho was sure, too, that Mrs. Jung was not aware of him being completely lost until and only until Hongjoong came. 

The said Hongjoong laughed loudly, one that echoed through the windows and within the laboratory. Yunho heard a few of his classmates chuckle, too, and maybe a little bit of his teacher nagging him.

But, just like how the lecture went, it passed through one ear only to leave another because Yunho was still so lost. He was a little stunned by how amazingly bright Hongjoong’s smile could be and how easily it attracted him, lured him in until he found himself chasing after it — like a part of a plant moving towards the source of light.

_It was so beautiful._

On the other hand, he had to make sure he would have his revenge on him later after embarrassing him in front of the whole class. He didn’t have a solid plan, though. He ended up tackling him to the floor the moment they saw each other in the hallways and tickled him to near death. Hongjoong gripped tight on his wrists and practically begged for him to stop in between giggles and tears brimming in his crescent-shaped eyes. But, Yunho stayed on top of him and tickled his sides despite the amount of strange looks they had been receiving from the students around them.

“You didn’t have to embarrass me in front of the whole class like that!” Yunho yelped, fingers still on Hongjoong’s sides until Hongjoong tapped his hand on his chest, which he took as a cue for him to stop.

“You don’t have to tickle me to the floor in a school hallway!” Hongjoong countered, still breathless from the amount of laughter shared.

Yunho smirked. “Well, if I could, I would.” He teased on tickling him one more time, but Hongjoong already sounded desperate on begging him to stop and still seemed exhausted from all the laughing. So, Yunho did stop and placed his hands on either side of Hongjoong’s head instead. 

And they were just like that, careless and reckless in a school hallway, with eyes fixed on each other and huge smiles on their faces. They seemed to not care at all about the outside world as long as they were together.

“I would tell you to get off me but,” Hongjoong laughed. It sounded so beautiful through Yunho’s ears. “You’re so pretty, especially when you smile like that.”

“Ah!” Yunho whined. That was a cue for him to get off Hongjoong. He crawled and sat on the cold floor, hands on both ears. Hongjoong did sit up, too; red hair in a bit of a mess, but he couldn't care less. 

“It’s so bright, Yunho!” Hongjoong exclaimed, hands above his hand and up in the air as he exaggerated, “How is it so bright?”

Yunho shook his head, hands still on both of his ears, hiding how red they must be already. “You are so embarrassing, hyung.”

Hongjoong slided closer to him only to raise his brows and tease him more. “But, you’re blushing.”

“Ah!” Yunho whined one more time before he stood up and left Hongjoong on the cold, wooden floor. Yet all he could think about was that - _god_ -

He really loved him so much.

_Day 57. It’s 12AM and I am thinking about his blush._

The 57th day was the 3rd day into their summer vacation. Yunho hated to admit it, but those days had been running agonizingly slow without having to go to school every morning. Despite how much he hated the idea of it, he simply wished he could spend today and the rest of the break in classrooms than in his own house. 

Also, Yunho was _deniably_ already missing Hongjoong so much. He hated sitting there on his bed without a strawberry-haired boy next to him. So, he had asked him to come over. At first, Hongjoong didn’t want to; “It’s too hot to ride the bicycle to your house,” he had said. But, Yunho had a more powerful excuse to convince him.

“I have ice cream,” he said through the phone call, a huge smile on his face because he did know he had no ice cream.

“It’s fine. We have one, too,” Yunho heard Hongjoong chuckle and so he frowned and let his face sink into his pillows as he whined. “Just tell me you miss me and go,” Hongjoong sang, soft giggles following afterwards.

Yunho scrunched his nose up and rolled over his bed, so he was facing up. “I miss you.”

Silence followed after that. Yunho would usually hate reoccurring silences especially when it was him who was the last to speak. But, this didn’t seem so bad at all for him.

“Fine. I’m coming over.”

And maybe truth was the most powerful card to play at all times.

Hongjoong did come over after 20 minutes of Yunho tossing and tumbling over his bed and fidgeting with his phone. What the strawberry-haired boy had in his hand was - well - a tub of ice cream and two spoons.

Yunho looked at him with raised eyebrows, confused. “What?” he deadpanned monotonously.

“I know you wouldn’t have ice cream,” Hongjoong shrugged as he had let himself into Yunho’s bed room, “And your mother gave me the spoons herself.”

“Well, that’s a surprise,” Yunho raised his eyebrows as he headed back to his bed so he could sit next to his boyfriend. 

Hongjoong squinted his eyes at him in curiosity. “What the hell you mean that’s a surprise? Your mother’s always loved me,” he said, a cheeky and bright smile up on his face. He later received a push from the other by the shoulders, but he only ignored him, too focused on opening the tub of ice cream. Then, he handed Yunho one spoon before they began digging in.

Yunho got himself a scoop, stuck it in his mouth, and lied back down on his bed. He stared at the ceiling in silence, recalling a dream, and nearly forgetting the other’s presence until he spoke.

“What’s up?” the red-haired had asked as he, too, stuck a spoon in his mouth and lied next to him.

He turned his head to the side and glanced at him, confused. “What do you mean what’s up?”

Hongjoong jutted his lower lip out in a thought. “All of a sudden, you miss me. Why?”

Yunho chuckled and pulled the spoon out of his mouth, his lips popping shut. He let out a sigh, maybe a breath he had been holding in since the second he woke up. His fixed eyes on Hongjoong slowly began to be softer and sadder, his lips forming into a pout. “I dreamt of you,” he finally said.

“Oh?” Hongjoong asked, raising his brows. He seemingly found this so amusing and exciting despite the apparent grays hovering above Yunho’s eyes. “What happened?”

“We were, like, lying down next to each other-”

“Like this?” Hongjoong asked, cutting him off.

“No!” Yunho whined, shaking his head with a pout which seemingly never wanted to go away. “It shouldn’t be.”

“Why are you so sad?” Hongjoong chuckled.

A sigh was exhaled once more before Yunho began again, “We were, like, looking at each other and while I was looking at you, it’s like, like you have seen everything.”

Hongjoong laughed softly once more. It was pretty obvious he could not understand why it was such a sad dream if he had seen everything. And he could not comprehend why Yunho’s eyes were fluttering slowly like petals of a flower that was about to wither. The visage was worrying him if he must admit, so he joked (well, partly, at least), “So, like this?” he asked as he brought his face closer to Yunho and stared far deep into the latter’s eyes. “I’m seeing everything.”

“Ah!” Yunho whined, slightly pushing the other away, but it was too weak enough to actually send him far. The pout returned back to his face while Hongjoong simply kept on laughing, his hands finding a way around the other’s waist.

“You’re saying that, but you are blushing,” Hongjoong teased.

Yunho shook his head in an attempt to take the creeping heat off his face. He knew to himself it would never work anyway, so he went to another resort. 

“It’s just the morning blush I always have,” he said, which they both knew was just an excuse. It was true that he would always have the shade of pink across his cheeks in early mornings. But, that time was right in the middle of the afternoon. The excuse was ironically of no use. They both knew it was so easy for Yunho to blush, especially when Hongjoong used his words.

So, Hongjoong only laughed it off, maybe finding it even more adorable now that Yunho tried his best to hide it.

“But, I just don’t understand why that dream made you sad. I’ve seen everything. So?” he questioned, raising his brows, desperate for a clear continuation.

Yunho shrugged. “It’s scary when you’ve seen everything and I haven’t yet.”

“What?”

“It’s like you’re leaving me.”

Hongjoong only blinked at him. He did not know how to react over the last few words shared. So, he only blinked and watched how Yunho’s eyes slightly shake as they look over his fidgeting hands, picking on his nails again and again.

“Why would you think that?” He chuckled it off after finally gathering up his thoughts.

Yunho shrugged as with a shaking voice, he said, “What’s more to come if you’ve seen everything? What would follow would always be you being taken away from me.” 

When Hongjoong looked at Yunho, he saw a few tears spilling from his eyes, rolling down on his cheeks, and sinking into the sheets. He gaped, his lips shaking. Hesitantly, he pulled Yunho even closer to him and allowed him to bury his nose into the crook of his neck, right where he cried it all out.

It was a heartbreaking sight, an unpleasant music that pulled at his heartstrings. Hongjoond did not know what else to say as he honestly could not fully comprehend whatever that was going on. He could not understand why, _why_ would Yunho think that way? So, he only chuckled it off, the sweet sound vibrating against the other’s ocean-colored hair, as his arms wrapped even tighter around him.

“Shut up. No one could ever take me away from you.”

Yunho sobbed to his shirt. The tears never seemed to stop and so did flashes of his last night’s dream. It appeared in his mind again and again as if it did not want to be forgotten. Ever.

“Heaven could,” Yunho had said, now giving the last piece of the puzzle that Hongjoong had been missing. So, he understood everything now.

Despite the crippling fear of the meaning Yunho’s dream could possibly be giving, Hongjoong shook his head, kept his arms around his waist, and a confident smile remained still on his face.

“Not even heaven could. No. No one and nothing could take me away from you.”

Yunho looked up from his neck and to Hongjoong, his doe eyes sad yet hopefully wondering.

“They could try, but I still won’t stop loving you,” Hongjoong smiled, sweetly and bright, one that could stop Yunho’s tears from falling, and one that could have him smiling back, too.

“Cheesy,” he said, playfully slapping his chest just so he could distract Hongjoong from noticing how the tips of his ears had gone red once more. But then again, it was of no use. Hongjoong would always notice every single thing about him.

“I really love how easy it is for you to blush,” Hongjoong giggled as he buried his nose into his boyfriend’s hair.

“It’s your words!” Yunho exclaimed as he sat up, pulling away from the hug which eventually became uncomfortable as it was in the middle of the afternoon on a summer day.

Hongjoong laughed, sitting up as well. He cupped Yunho’s face with his own small hands and with his thumbs, he wiped the remaining tears off his cheeks. “Too bad, you can never run away from my words.”

Yunho only frowned on that 57th day. He wasn’t able to realize what Hongjoong meant until it was the 176th.

_Day 176. Not a reason but it’s amazing how it’s the 176th day of you being my boyfriend but i still haven’t run out of reasons as to why i love you._

Today has actually been hundreds of days since the 176th. As Yunho sits alone in Hongjoong’s room with the strawberry-patterned, pink notebook in his hand, he flips to another page, hoping Hongjoong has written something new. However, there aren’t any, of course. No words. No ink. Nothing. Neither in the other pages a couple flips after.

Except at the very last page of the diary, Yunho finds something familiar. It’s the sketch of him that Hongjoong made. The one which Hongjoong showed him while they were in the bleachers at the school field. The one where Yunho had seen himself with blue hair for the first time. What he finds new in the page is there happen to be a couple words written at the bottom part, saying:

_I hope I’ve written about you until this very last page. If not, im sorry haha to compensate, i drew you and even used watercolors!! Be proud of me!!_

That is when Yunho cannot hold himself any longer. He feels his very own heart shatter into the smallest pieces within the sinking hole in his chest. Tears begin falling from his eyes and before they drop on the last page of Hongjoong’s diary as he throws a palm over his mouth to muffle his sobs. 

On the 324th day, Yunho cries over Hongjoong _again,_ just as he always does since the 176th day. He has never stopped thinking about how warm his arms feel when around his waist, or how bright his smile was; it always lured him in, or just how simply adorable he was. Yunho has never stopped missing Hongjoong since the 176th, when the heavens had decided to take him away from him, to show him that they could, whether Hongjoong liked it or not, and whether it would burn a hole right through Yunho’s chest or not.

Today, Yunho sits there in Hongjoong’s room, alone, with the strawberry-patterned notebook in his hand. He has seen the diary before, but he has never been able to find out what it is. He has always thought it’s just one of those notebooks where Hongjoong drew and wrote during tedious classes to pass the time. If it were not for Mingi who had been informed about it by Hongjoong himself a few days prior, Yunho would have never known.

It’s a little funny to think about. Yunho and Hongjoong have been boyfriends for months. Both of them notice each other with those notebooks in their hands - the pink one for Hongjoong and the blue one for Yunho. But, they had never known that everyday, _always_ they wrote about each other. 

Too bad, Hongjoong had never found out about everything Yunho wrote for him.

Yunho finally shuts the diary close. He carefully places it on the bed by his side while he takes his own notebook from his bag. Thumbing through the pages, Yunho notices that he only has a few leaves left. On one of those, Yunho writes:

_324th. I had a cold nightmare. It was bittersweet. Thanks to you._

_I love you still, angel. And I am proud of you._


End file.
